Ok, I was wrong. Way wrong.
I had publicly (and privately, oh yes, privately) .
Wow, that was a show.
Now don’t get me wrong, there were awful parts of it. Unbeknownst to me, there were not one, but two opening acts. One of them was Sebastian Bach, no, not , the other one, the one who used to be in Skid Row, one of the multitudinous forgettable hair bands of the late ’80s. You might remember their songs “I Remember You” or “18 and Life” or “Youth Gone Wild.”
As I commented to Tracey, Bach should now just be singing “Youth Gone.” He’s but seemed much, much older, perhaps because he’s wearing his hair so long that that the girl from The Ring called to ask for hair care tips. Seriously, he’s trying to live out the rest of his life as an 18-20 year old in the late ’80s. The ship has sailed. Actually, the ship has wood rot and sank.
It’s not just the look. The “music” was bad. At first I thought it was where we were sitting — about 15 feet from the stage and a 6 foot high pile of speakers pointed at us. When he did the three hit songs I realized that he could actually be intelligible, but he was just screaming the “lyrics” into the mike. The result was painful to me, and I hadn’t had 16 beers like most of the people down in the mosh pit area. I can’t even imagine how it must have sounded to them, but there isn’t one of them who could understand what he was saying. I told Tracey he might as well have been singing in German.
The saddest part was when he said it had been 16 years since he had been to Huntington “when I opened for Guns ‘N’ Roses” and I thought “Dude, 16 years… And you’re still just the opening act.”
And only the first of two. The second was something called “Papa Roach.” We had already decided by the time Bach finished his set that we were going to sit out the “Papa Roach” section of the concert. I had never heard of … him? it? and had no desire to subject myself to more of it. I was already questioning my long-term chances of regaining my hearing. We went out into the lobby/vending area, and the music was still too loud. When we would walk by an entryway I would hear it clearly, and it was much, much worse than Bach.
The 8 p.m. starting time led to an almost 11 p.m. starting time for Guns ‘N’ Roses. Rose no longer has his trademark straight, long, red hair. I had mentioned that in the previous article I wrote. Yes, that was Rose in the picture. His hair is not cut short (as it appears in the picture), but pulled back. After seeing Bach, this was actually refreshing. Rose isn’t hanging onto his 80s look.
Tracey had said that they had a new album, but only included about 3 songs from the new album in the concert, which is good. Not many people are going to a GNR concert for new music. He did all the songs you’d expect.
Now I’ve never seen anyone enjoy performing more than Sting. I can now say that I’ve never seen anyone perform with more energy than Axl. He ran around that stage for three hours. He rarely stood still. We were off stage right about 45° We were as close as the front row of the general admission mosh pit, just off to the side. In chairs. With backs on them. Like civilized people. He spent a good deal of the show close enough for me to see details on his face. The man is intense while performing.
All in all it was a really good concert. Definitely got our money’s worth. Once he came out on stage he never stopped until the end. I went from being able to understand less than 1% of the words that Bach “sang’ to probably 85% for GNR. Part of that probably was the proximity to the wall of speakers, another part was that most concerts I’ve ever been to the vocal mikes are never as loud as they need to be when put up against all the other instruments.
The show on the stage was only part of it. The show of watching people was almost as entertaining, albeit at times laced with sadness.
“Why would people spend this much on a concert and then get completed wasted?” Tracey asked. Good question. There was an obscene amount of alcohol being consumed, and several people unable to walk without assistance by the end of the first act.
That wasn’t the entertaining part. Most of the off-stage entertainment came in the form of clothing worn by female members of the audience. 98.3% of the males we wearing jeans and a t-shirt, although one guy was wearing a leather jacket with metal beadding and a Southern Flag across the back. I caught someone standing nearby snap a picture of it with her cameraphone.
Some clothing ought to come with an expiration date. gurus tell women to avoid mini-skirts after age 35. There were many, many women who had exceeding that deadline by 10+ years. At least. There was a plethora of things too low and things too high, said not from a prudish sentiment, but merely a practical one. These outfits may have once made you look/feel sexy. From the looks of them and the looks of those wearing them, those days have passed.
As I said, the men were mostly all forgetable, although I did spot one guy who looked like at age 40. Huh-huh.
Last note… I caught about 6 people last night, about 4 women and 2 men. We were at the front row of our section, and the travel aisle was right in front of us. People from behind us would climb directly over the chairs and I, knowing that there was a step down that most of them didn’t know about, I’d guide them. It’d be tough to navigate sober, and none of the people needing help were in any risk of being found guilty of that. I caught the girl sitting next to me at least 6 times, her boyfriend/husband even thanked me for helping out at one point. She yelled her drunken love for Axl at regular intervals.
More funny was the woman in front of us. She was, I’d guess, pushing 230-240 lbs and 1.2 . She would step over the back of her chair and stumble across the aisle and steady herself using my leg when I was seated. After doing this 2 or 3 times she apologized to Tracey and promised “I’m not hitting on your man.” Somehow that was an assurance I don’t think she had to make to assuage a fear no one had.
As if the night hadn’t held enough different forms of entertainment, on the way home we came to a police “checkpoint”. Two cars in front of us took sudden turns into the Taco Bell upon seeing the lights. The car in front of us seemed to go right through but they waved us to stop. I rolled down my window. I should mention it was about 24°F/-5° C out.
“How are we doing tonight?” the officer asked. “Doing great,” “We’re doing a traffic survey, it takes about 3 minutes if you’re interested.” “What kind of survey?” “A traffic survey.” Please note that I resisted the urge to say “DUH!” to a police officer. “Well I don’t live around here…” “It doesn’t matter… If you don’t want to participate…” “Yeah we’ve got an hour drive…” “Ok, have a good night.”
Unsurprisingly as we drove on we looked over and saw what seemed to be field sobriety tests being administered. Since we were 2 of the 17 completely sober people at the concert, it seemed like a waste of time to have us be in the “survey”.
Tracey: “What’s surprising is that he let you not take it.” “My guess is that he knew from talking to me that it wasn’t a big issue.” “Or smelling you” “Yeah, that too.”
Ah, good times. At least we remember the concert today. I wonder how many others can say the same.
Still, if you enjoyed their music at all in the 80s/early 90s, checkout the concert.